Love on the Air - Podcast of The Whole Parent

Introduction to Love on the Air (Episode 0.5)

Each one of us wants to feel loved. We seek a partner. We navigate dating introductions to hopefully find someone to share our lives with. We commit to a relationship and try to make it work. We fail. And we find the courage and energy to start over.
We all want to be loved. We seek love. We find someone to love. Then what happens next?
Being in a loving relationship is a continuous process of micro-corrections in our everyday lives together. We will all have difficulties and disagreements, the trick is how we choose to address them as a couple. In a healthy and consciously aware relationship, we can make choices that move us towards our partner.
read it all at The Whole Parent

Sexual Fulfillment: I Don’t Know The Answer, Let’s Find Out Together

Here’s the thing we all want to talk about. Or, we don’t want to talk about. But, we need to talk about. There is a lot we don’t know about sex.
My sex. Your sex. Sex with another person. Sex other than hetero-ciz white male sex. That’s my DNA, I can’t change it. I’m willing to learn. I’m willing to discover our sexual preferences. I’m even open to exploring my outside edge when it comes to sexual turn-ons and turn-offs. What I don’t know about, I won’t assume I don’t like. “Let’s find out together.”
Read the entire article here: Sexual Fulfillment

Happier In Divorce: Resilience, Setting the Example for My Kids

Happy With Things Just As They Are
I learned to be happy in spite of the divorce. I found a way to embrace myself and my joy within the darkness and aloneness that tried to overwhelm me after the divorce. I lost my kids and I knew I’d have to reemerge as a happy and healthy dad, so they could learn from my example. I am showing my kids how to live. I am giving them examples, even now, nine years after the divorce, of how to form healthy relationships. And I am attempting to keep sharing my happiness and hopefulness with them.
I wish I could’ve had more time with my kids. I wish my then-wife had agreed to 50/50 shared parenting. I wish my ex-wife would be a more collaborative parent. But even as I wish about these things, even as I can feel regret about the lost time, I am HAPPIER NOW THAN I HAVE EVER BEEN IN MY LIFE.
Read the entire post here: Next-Level Parenting

A New Language of Sex: Embarking on the Learning Together

I’d like to imagine that I get better and better at sex over time. Of course, my aging body may have a slightly different course, but, at the moment, we’re all on the up and up. No little blue helper is needed at this point. Still, sex is different. Deeper, richer, and less concentrated on the orgasm. But this didn’t happen overnight. This happened as an evolution. I listened to my partners, I read books about sexual intelligence, I tuned in to my own body and tried to decipher its hidden messages. Here’s what I learned: I’m evolving.
Sex Gets Better and Deeper the More You Practice
Just like any other physical activity (yoga, running, swimming, tennis) sex gets better the more you practice. Sometimes it’s good to practice by yourself, to understand your own mechanics and proclivities. In a relationship, it’s good to tune into the rhythms of your sexual desires, understanding that sometimes they will not be in sync, but when they are… Watch out.
Monogamy offers the opportunity to practice and meditate and discuss sex for an extended period of time. Over time, I can learn ways to get us both off. Over time, I can discover ways to get you off that leave me completely fulfilled as well. Over time, I can set both our bodies on fire with a few words of poetry and a gentle brush of my fingers across the back of your neck. Over time, I’m going to find the places that drive you mad. I promise not to overuse them. And I promise to keep exploring, seeking, new erogenous zones, ones that neither of us has ever uncovered.
 
You can read the entire article on The New Language of Sex from The Whole Parent.

Pausing in the Gap: Trying to Force An Answer Is Not the Way

In the past, I had a partner who had a hard time deciding where she wanted to eat. I’d say something like, “Well, can we start with what kind of food you want to get?”
“Um, I don’t really care.”
“All right, how about breakfast tacos?”
“No.”
“TexMex?
“No.”
“Okay, how about Italian or Thai?”
“I don’t know.”
STOP.
Okay, this is a simplified example. But here is what I’ve learned about myself (that I am attempting to understand better in this post) in this example.
I Want To Know Your Decision, Your Wishes, What YOU Want
I'll see you on the whole parent. Here is the text of this episode.  Pausing In the Gap on The Whole Parent.

Liberating Sexual Desire, a conversation with Eva Blake

In our conversation, Eva and I cover a lot of ground about sex and relationships. And here were my immediate takeaways that will be fleshed out in the full podcast. This is a fraction of what we cover:
Sexual awareness and liberation begin with yourself. Your own experience of sex. What turns you on. How you please yourself. How confident and comfortable you are with your own sexual body. I had to give a hearty yes to this one. And it dovetails nicely into Eva's path to progress in her work.
Desire
Body
Voice
Desire: If you understand your desire and what you want (both in a partner, in a sexual experience, and in life) you can take clear and intentional actions toward that goal. Your desire is your guide and your fuel. Your path is always towards what you want. Tuning into your desire is step one.
Body: Your body is where the magic happens. This is where ecstasy happens, and this is where trauma or dysfunction can also be trapped. By connecting with and having conscious conversations with your own body you can begin to unlock more energy to fuel your journey. Shut down parts of our body are where we store shame, trauma, sexual fears, inhibition.
Voice: By connecting with your desire and your body you can give rise to a more powerful and directed voice. Your authenticity comes through when you are connected to your body and your ambitious desire. You must give voice to your goals and needs. Even in leadership outside the bedroom, a person who is well-grounded in self-love and awareness has a stronger stance to lead the rest of the world from.
In the board room and in the bedroom, desire is the fire that gets things done. The more you can connect and harness your desires and aspirations, the more power and passion you will have to light the way forward to creating your best life.
 
You can find Eva Blake's information on her Facebook page Liberating Desire: Sex, Love, Relationships
Be sure and listen to the whole podcast to get the most out of Eva's advice and expertise. And check The Whole Parent for more illuminating content about relationship-building, dating, sex, and parenting.
 
John McElhenney - Relationship-Building Coach

Giving Time: If This Moment Is All We Have

That’s what life is all about. Time. Who you give it to. How you spend it. What you do with your life defines how your life will be. 
If This Moment is All We Have (read online)
Then everything we are thinking, from moment to moment, form our experience of life. If we are living in regret of things that didn’t go as we planned, to losses, or broken promises, we’re missing this present moment. (There are places and time for processing regrets, but you must get over them, and let go of the ongoing pain of regret.) If we are living in fear of the coming storm we are missing this beautiful moment of now. Many great thinkers have spoken of this “present moment” awareness with much greater clarity and insight than I can, but I am going to add my moments of enlightenment to this conversation.

Where There‘s a WE There‘s a Way

Love on the Air 2021 - our first post-pandemic shutdown episode. Let's talk about the WE container and how considering your partner first, as a reflexive and healthy way of including them in your WE is a skill that will help you grow in your relationship and in your own self-care routines.

Closing the Available Exits In Your Relationship to Find Your Edge

Episode 10: 
The end of a relationship is a double-edged sword.
Cutting Edge One: I'm free to seek and love someone new. My horizon is boundless and unlimited.
Cutting Edge Two: I'm letting go of someone I really care about, what if my exit is a mistake?
What We Can Learn By Leaving a Relationship
What We Can Learn By Staying in a Relationship
How To Sharpen Your Edge As a Couple
Get all the Love on the Air Episodes at PodBean - Love on the Air.
Always Love,
John McElhenney – life coach austin texasFacebook  | Instagram | Pinterest |  @wholeparent
 I'll see you on The Whole Parent

Parenting After Divorce Offers Fresh Challenges: FAYR - The Co-parenting App May Offer Solutions

Michael Daniels talks about how he built FAYR - the Co-parenting app to solve many of the issues facing divorced parents. If you can agree on one thing, the kids welfare comes first, then any tool to help parents negotiate and navigate the complex partnership after divorce is a welcomed advance. FAYR could be that tool that sets parents more at ease after divorce. 
Get all the Love on the Air Episodes at PodBean - Love on the Air.
Always Love,
John McElhenney – life coach austin texasFacebook  | Instagram | Pinterest |  @wholeparent